let’s go for a swim
See that little boulder in the back? All Solo does all day long is make circles around that boulder. He goes up over and down under through the opening, then back up and around. He does this over and over, sometimes more than twenty times in a row. I want to record it, but any time I point a camera at him, he stops moving. Solo has a pretty big tank all to himself, so why does he stay only in that back corner?
It gets me angry. Even when I feed him at the opposite end of the tank, he comes to eat then quickly swims back to circle that boulder. I wonder if God is watching me make circles around LA and gets frustrated. I know my father’s frustrated at me, but then again when is he not? He’s right though. I really can’t stay at one thing for a long time, whether it be a religion, a relationship, or a job. I just loop around these jobs, and I don’t really get anywhere.
I think I ought to take bigger risks to break the cycle, regardless of whether I can afford it or not. I can never really afford to gamble, but I still do. I just don’t think spending 85% of my life under some company, alongside people I would never befriend outside of work, following orders I don’t agree with, is the best way to live. I do it for money, so I can live, but I’m not living. I’d rather have tried 100 things in the one life I have, than having stayed at 1 thing all my life. I need to go explore what’s on the opposite side of my tank.
